Many Talents One Life An Inventive Biography of
by Gabrielle Baer
Summary: One fanfic author's notion of how a genius named Artemus Gordon came to be


Artemus Gordon: A Biography by Roniyah Gabrielle Caitrin Dovah Bhaer

Artemus Alastair Lachlan Gordon was born Monday, March 22, 1830, in Gdansk, Poland, the son of Miriam Reveka Morjanelski Gorniak and Reuven Yakov Gorniak. The couple named their third born and only surviving child Adamech Elisha Auriel Gorniak. When 'Little Adam' was barely two years old; his parents and some of their cousins, fleeing wars and persecution in Poland, eagerly took ship for America. After an arduous passage, including the treacherously stormy route around Cape Horn, they reached northern California. The young family was in San Francisco at last!

Adam grew up fast, always watching everything his parents worked on, always underfoot in the chemist/pharmacy shop his father and mother later bought outright. And he proved himself very bright at an early age, too, learning every language he heard in that polyglot environment , quickly adding Parisian and Quebecois French, Castilian and 'North American Spanish, Italian, Farsi, Greek, Swedish, Chinese, Gaelic, Portuguese and English to the German, Polish, Russian, Hungarian and Yiddish he was immersed in at home.

Music, he would later say was truly his second language, though. Miriam was an accomplished singer, composer and violinist from childhood. She'd been given a specially commissioned ivory-edged violin by her tutor in Gdansk as a wedding present. And from his birth she taught her son to make and to love music, himself. And it was Miriam who for a time believed her son might become a cantor, when the first shul was established in The City. For the rest of his life, Adam/Artemus turned to his mother's musical legacy for solace, for joy and for the love of creating and performing 'beauty in sound.' He went on to compose hundreds of pieces, and dedicated each one to his 'ima Miri'.

Reuven, on the other hand wanted his often daydreaming natured son to have 'something practical to fall back on'. He was delighted when Adam showed an inherited gift for science as well, especially for chemistry and related inventions of many kinds. For a time, Reuven thought the boy would take those interests a step further and study medicine with one of the physicians he worked with himself. But there was a great deal more the boy wanted to learn and to do. Nevertheless, Adam soaked up everything his father and those physicians could teach him about ailments, injuries, treatments and healing, and used it many times in later years, especially when 'patching up partners.'

But by age ten, Adam was far more interested in the life of 'The City'. Pre-Gold Rush San Francisco was in some ways a sleepy town on a beautiful bay. But, a rougher, more exciting San Francisco was coming to birth. For the next eight years, Adam Gorniak got his first taste of, and his taste for living at least two very different lives at the same time. It was exciting to the growing youth, knowing the hazards he faced. If his parents found out Adam was 'wasting time' on the streets, learning to gamble, to fight and to 'grift', that is to work confidence games on unsuspecting neighbors and newcomers, they'd likely disown him. And if his street friends found out his immigrant background, things would go hard for him, too. This was a time when, even in the less restricted atmosphere of California, many Americans were not particularly open to the tides of immigrants coming from Northern and Eastern Europe.

At eighteen, a whole different life opened up for Adam Gorniak, or 'Eli Gordon' as his street friends knew him. For six years, he taken odd jobs at every theatre he could walk to in the City. And he'd been conning his way into any concert, opera, or play he could find. The wider, wilder, worlds they showed entranced him completely. He loved the music, the people, the language, the costumes, and makeup. He loved every minute of it. And more as time went by, 'Eli' jumped at each opportunity to act onstage.

Then a little thing called the Gold Rush came to California, around the same time as a 'bump in the road' known as the Mexican War was going on to the south. Suddenly Eli Gordon and the troupes he worked with were busier than ever, entertaining gold miners, grifters, and soldiers alike. And suddenly a simple street-grifter's name such as 'Eli Gordon' wouldn't work for a young leading man growing more accomplished and better known all the time. _Et voila!_ Artemus Alastair Lachlan Gordon was born! And when a national troupe finally came to the City, 'Artemus' saw his best chance and never looked back. That company was led by Junius Brutus Booth, and his son Edmund, and the experience of working with world renowned actors was almost worth the experience of being fired for upstaging the elder Booth once too often!

Now for twelve years, 'Artemus Gordon' was busy with an entirely new class of 'stealing'. He stole scenes, he stole shows, and sometimes he 'stole' acting roles, too. In the latter case it was more often true that an actor in a major supporting or main role simply was too sick or too drunk to go on. And someone had to step in as their understudy, after all. Adam/Artemus knew he was very lucky when he got those chances. And he took every advantage when a 'plum role' came his way. With great glee, and to better and better reviews, Artemus played his way through the Shakespearean quartos, on into the works of Christopher Marlowe, Moliere, Racine, Rostand, and Greek classics. Iago, Mercutio, Tybalt, Horatio and Laertes were some of his first favorites and best. But to these the young actor soon added turns as Henry V, Richard III, Macbeth, Othello, Romeo and Hamlet, and won acclaim for each one.

The only negative in all this was his father's outspoken disapproval. The two men hardly talked or wrote during this time. Miriam on the other hand loved her son's artistic genius and welcomed the theatre tickets he always made sure she had. Smiling at the crowds that increasingly surrounded 'Adamech' after a performance, Miri would always make her presence known by quietly applauding the young actor from the doorway of the green room. Time after time she saw her son smile back, even while he glanced around for Reuven. Time after time Artemus pushed his disappointment aside and made 'ima Miri' the star of the after-play parties.

Artie as he encouraged his friends to call him these days, was lucky too in making many friends in his travels. Three of those friends would become lifelong colleagues; Jeremy Pike, James Richmond and Frank Harper. Pike was a fellow actor. Richmond and Harper both were Regular Army. And so while he knew he could easily get along with Jeremy's sardonic nature, the friendship that grew up with then Major Richmond and Captain Harper surprised Artie at first. Frank's talent for poker and other card tricks amused Artie and Richmond's rarely seen dry wit proved to be something they had in common as well.

But tragedy stopped a now soaring career. Through younger cousins who kept in closer touch with his son, Reuven Gorniak sent word to Chicago. Miriam was dying. Her leukemia, diagnosed years before had entered its final stages. And, those cousins noted Reuven, wasn't 'so well' himself. He was exhausted with his wife care and often suffering chest pains as well. A frantic journey west, arranged partly with the help of his two Army friends, finally brought the wanderer home again. It was late summer, 1860, and especially back across the Mississippi, the country was tearing apart. When he laid his parents to rest, Adam Gorniak felt as though he'd buried himself beside them. Only his mother's violin, and his father's portable chemist-kit went east with 'Artemus' now.

Back in Illinois again, Artemus Gordon campaigned ardently for Lincoln that fall, after hearing the 'rail-splitting railroad attorney candidate speak only once. Once was more than enough to convince Gordon of the man's patent integrity and principles. And his stance against the westward expansion of slavery sealed the matter, as far as Artie was concerned. The times were dangerous, even desperate. At least half a dozen southern states had already declared that Lincoln's election would force them into secession. Artemus knew, from his theatrical tours in the South that the fire-eaters there would carry out their promise. Events were moving at a breathless, breakneck pace now. Lincoln was elected without even one electoral vote from the Southern states. Nine of those states kept their promise and broke from the Union.

And now for the first time, Artemus Gordon entered the field of espionage and made use of the subterfuges he'd learned as a boy in the City. Confederates and their sympathizers were already plotting against the new President -elect. Alan Pinkerton and other private agents had already uncovered dozens of such violent schemes. The whole matter of Lincoln traveling from Springfield to Washington to be inaugurated was becoming more and more problematic.

Artemus, now based in Chicago, while directing and starring in a new production of _Cyrano_ _de Bergerac,_ met once more with Jeremy who had the role of de Guise. Together the two actors contacted Frank Harper and James Richmond, and the quartet tried to brainstorm 'added layers' of security for the President-elect. Richmond passed some of their notions on to Lincoln's aides. But he wouldn't go along with, or pass along Artie's main suggestion, that Frank Harper, who stood nearly as tall as the Illinois-rail splitter stand in for 'The Man' at most if not all public appearances along the way.

There was then no Congressionally legislated or officially designated command, organization or unit for the President's protection. There would be none for another eight years. And the plotters, southern sympathizers in the North called 'Copperheads', as well as Confederate agents in the North and in Canada did not stop plotting with Lincoln's inauguration in March, 1861. Knowing this, Richmond, Pike, Harper and Gordon, along a number of other concerned civilians and Army officials began working together, informally, on counter-plots to keep Lincoln alive. Without realizing it, these men were forming the foundations of what would later be the Presidential security arm of the United States Secret Service. All they knew was they wanted their President protected to the best of their combined abilities.

When Fort Sumter fell, Artie was back in California, taking the stage once again alongside Jeremy Pike, in a production of his own invention: 'Shakespeare's People and Poems. And for the highly successful month long run of the play in San Francisco, Artie and Jeremy made their work a little more interesting by trading off, playing Iago or Othello, Macbeth or MacDuff, Horatio, Laertes or Hamlet, Mercutio, Tybalt or Romeo and so forth. But they had more up their flowing Elizabethan style sleeves than a poetic speech or a prop sword. The two actors were now spending half their time, if not more, seeking out 'Copperheads' and Confederate spies in California.

But Jefferson Davis ordered Pierre Beauregard to fire on Sumter. And Lincoln called for thousands of 90 volunteer soldiers. Now, the War came and both actors knew if they were to continue covertly working for the as yet loosely organized Army Intelligence department, the Army would demand their enlistments. With his main home established in Chicago these days, Artie trained back east and in June signed on with the 20th Illinois Volunteer Infantry.

During all four years of the War, under the aegis of often changed organizational titles, Artie, Frank, Jeremy, James Richmond and many other soldier-agents did 'double duty' serving their commands as soldiers and serving the Armies, in Artie's case the Army of the Cumberland and of the Tennessee respectively as spies. His career as an actor served the ingenious young man very well in the realm of military espionage. And what surprised him more, was that Artemus found himself enjoying the risks when the issues at hand were of such tremendous importance.

In October of '61, when the Union Army was still licking it's wounds from First Bull Run, and still reorganizing for the long haul ahead, Frank Harper got a number of his friends together for one of his famous lull in the storm poker games. Artie by this time was well familiar with Frank's skill in such contests and declined. But for once the usually laid-back Harper was insistent. There would be some 'youngsters' there, Frank said, meaning young officers who had yet to 'enjoy' Harper's talent as gambler. And that evening, while Artie was carefully keeping his bets low and his bluffs subtle, Frank introduced him to a newly-minted First Lieutenant, another soldier-agent, by the name of James Torrance Kieran West. Neither Gordon nor West left a written record regarding this first meeting for posterity to see how they 'hit it off'.

The major battles and campaigns in which the 20th Illinois took part were : Fort Henry and Fort Donelson, February, 1862, Shiloh and Corinth, April, '62, Central Mississippi Campaign, November, '62 - January, 1863, Port Gibson, Raymond, Jackson, Big Black, May' 63, the siege of Vicksburg, May 18- July 4, '63, Atlanta Campaign, June- September '64, Battle of Kennesaw Mtn June-July, '64, Battle of Atlanta, July 22, '64, siege of Atlanta, July 22- August 25th, '64, Jonesboro, August, '64, operations against John Bell Hood, Sept-Nov '64, March to the Sea, Nov 15- Dec, 10 '64. Campaign of the Carolinas January- April, '65, Fayetteville, Bentonville, Goldsboro, Raleigh, March '65. Surrender of the Army of Tennessee by Jos. Johnston, April 26, '65. Grand Review, May 24th, '65. The 20th was mustered out July 16th and discharged at Chicago, July 24th, 1865.

During the Fort Henry-Donelson campaign, Artie's covert work came to the attention of Ulysses Grant, and earned him the General's rarely given commendation. Grant was very pleased with the constant accuracy of the information Artemus' spying efforts collected for him, and not a little amazed by the numerous characters the young man turned into to do that work. Artie's bravery wasn't lost on Grant, either, in wartime going behind enemy lines out of uniform meant a man would be summarily hung if captured. In his turn, Artie found Grant remarkable both for his tactical brilliance, his unyielding determination for the fighting they yet to do, and for his utterly unassuming manner as well.

This mutual admiration would lead to a long term working association between these two very different men, and to a great deal besides. When the War finally ended, Artemus already knew he could go back to touring in any theatrical company he chose. And that's what he did, for much of the next year and a half, finding himself less and less satisfied with 'just acting' now. He'd spent four years using those skills, and his science and inventing, his languages, even his music at times for the War effort. What was there to do now, In peacetime, that could let him make good use of all those different talents?

Then things turned around for him almost as quickly as they had just before the War began. A ruthlessly ambitious Federal prosecutor in Norfolk, VA convened a Grand Jury, which in fact issued an indictment against Robert E Lee for treason. The next step would have been to try the former Commander of the Army of Northern Virginia in a Federal Court. President Andrew Johnson was ready and wiling to go along with this scheme, despite the terms of the surrender Lee signed at Appomattox. And when he found about this, Ulysses Grant who gave Lee those surrender terms was utterly livid.

This Federal Grand Jury's potential secret indictment would abrogate that document entirely and break Grant's sworn word! Grant was now "General of the Armies" and as such he started protesting and seeking to find out the facts of the matter. He sent for the best pair of former soldier-agents he knew of, Artemus Gordon and James West. Their new assignment, which would have to be even more covert than any wartime mission, was to find out who was really pushing for Lee to go on trial, and proof of what would happen to the barely reunited country if he did!

Both young men eagerly took on the General's mission. Jim used every contact he had in Virginia and the Carolinas. Artie used every trick of their mutual espionage trade and then invented some more. As during the War the two men worked exceptionally well together. As before they found out information no one else could. Armed with their findings, and his own huge public approval Grant went to Johnson and sternly informed the President he would be not only losing his 'General of the Armies' if he allowed

Lee's trial to go forward, he would be **re-igniting the War!** And on top of all that, the two agents confirmed a report Grant already had, Lee was terminally ill. Any such technically legal 'kangaroo court' set up against him would be trying a dying man! Gordon and West were a triumphant team once again. And both men agreed they much preferred this type of occupation, helping their former Commander do something that also protected the country at large.

Also the assassination of Lincoln had made it crystal clear to the men who'd served in the Army's Intelligence service that more than a uniformed 'escort' was needed to safeguard the Commander in Chief. No formal organization for such work existed at that time. None would for some time afterwards. But the Secret Service, whose main work was against counterfeiters, was developing a small corps of agents who would, when necessary, take on tougher, more complicated assignments. Artemus Gordon, in a rare event for him, he always insisted, volunteered to take on those duties, and more.

When Ulysses Grant became President, in March of 1869, he changed Artie's duties … exponentially, based on the younger man's excellent record and proven loyalty. Grant made his protégé a special agent, officially part of the Secret Service, but reporting directly to Grant himself. And to Artemus' pleased surprise, the President teamed him once more with Jim West. Together, that team proved themselves resourceful, cunning, courageous and more than worthy of the President's own adamantine loyalty. For fifteen afterwards, they stopped one plot, enemy and conspiracy after another that would have otherwise damaged, divided or destroyed the nation they gladly served with Honor.

After suffering a pair of 'mild heart seizures', Artie 'took a break' from field work at the strong suggestion of his friends and his doctors, starting in the winter of 1883-84. But no one who knew the ingenious former actor even thought of the word retired as having anything to do with Artemus Gordon, and neither did he. Instead Artie moved almost seamlessly into the role of the Service Academy's Director, instructing and counseling hundreds of future agents on everything from how to blow up the 'bad guys' instead of yourself, to using the Classics as the source of impenetrable ciphers and codes, to 'dressing the part' of any character they could begin to imagine. His classes in weapons and medical chemistry were the most attended in the Academy's history. His lectures on 'character building' were more entertaining than most contemporary theatre productions, his students often insisted and more practicable as well.

In the spring of 1893, Artie married an auburn haired, hazel eyed willowy former actress who had 'followed' him from the stage to the Secret Service as an agent and then an instructor, herself. The escalating numbers of young women joining the agency called for more and more of such gifted ladies to train them. And like her mentor and husband to be, this brave young woman used a stage name/cover name to keep her family protected. That protection was eventually extended so far as to become Agency policy. And unfortunately, a fire at the Secret Service complex in Denver in 1901 destroyed all traces of this woman's origins or her birth name, entirely. What is known about her was that she was unquestionably a match for Artemus' in courage, in wits, in humor, in linguistics, and numerous other skills. The couple was deeply devoted and in '96, their only child, a boy they named Elisha James Reuven Gordon was born.

Then, also in 1901,came the 'greatest shock of my life' as Artie called it in his journals. As fate would have it, the Service' Director was at the Academy in Denver when that same devastating fire took place. Artie had, very reluctantly, and with every intent of keeping it on a temporary basis, taken on the post of Assistant Director. Now he was heading the agency, very much against his own wishes, and very much in accordance with the wishes of the new President, Theodore Roosevelt. These two very dynamic, determined men 'locked horns' on this issue and quite a few others, and as protocol demanded, the President won, on almost every such occasion.

The Service was in need of a 'good shaking up' and a dam good stirring about, as well', Roosevelt stated, following the assassinations of James Garfield and William McKinley. Artemus, 'Teddy' concluded had always been good at both. Artie kept up his protests, stating his former partner and friend Jim West would be far better suited to the task at hand. But on this question, as on so many others, the youngest President would not be moved. Nor did Jim want the job, he insisted, grinning widely at his very much flummoxed friend. So, Artie was now Director, and as such he gleefully turned the tables on Jim. Within weeks of Artie's taking over as Service Director, President Roosevelt appointed James West to head the new Service Academy complex in Fairfax, VA.

Throughout the first two decades of the new century, these old partners worked closely once more. And for all their public shows of chagrin or resentment, they loved it. And despite his new, 'unasked for, unwanted work load', Artie took on still more, as did his former partner. Artemus donated to, sponsored, toured and funded theatrical companies from Boston to New Orleans and from Washington to Chicago and more. James funded, sponsored, donated to, and toured for new veterans hospitals wherever they were most needed.

On Tuesday, January 5th, 1920, at his 'second home' just north west of Chicago, Artemus Alastair Lachlan Gordon passed away peacefully, surrounded by family, friends and many, many students, after suffering another 'mild heart seizure. He had been, much like his old mentor, Ulysses Grant, writing his memoirs for the past year and a half, and just sent the final galleys away to the printer with all corrections completed, it's title " Many Talents - One Life'. His beloved wife had passed away only two years before him. Artemus was survived by his son and his grandchildren, by his closest friend, Jim West, and by the 'scads' of friends, admirers and recipients of his many gifts from the past nearly 90 years. He was 89, less than two months 'shy' of his 90th birthday.


End file.
